All things dream

I am a dreamer at heart. I dream a lot, imagine myriad nice things happening to me which are crazy in real life. This post is not about them.

What I do is day dreaming, eyes open or close but I am awake.

From my college time, I have had a recurring dream. The basic plotline remains same. I am alone or with someone, I have luggage and I am at railway station. I have to catch a train at a scheduled place and time. Due to some or the other reason, I am not able to and I have a fear that I will miss it. I can not recall if I actually miss it, cos I wake up before the end. This basic plot recurs where sometime I am already in a train, which is all secluded, I am with someone and need to get down at a certain point and from there catch a train. My current train is running late, I am with lot of luggage and dont know what to do. A few times, I have got down at wrong station and my home is very far and I dont know how to reach the other station. I dont have phone or money (or may be I have lost the sense to use them). Sometimes I am at the platform waiting for the train but somehow I dont have the ticket. Train is at a far away platform and it is impossible for me to buy the ticket and then board the train. Sometimes I am resting at the platform with a lot of luggage and overslept. when I get up, I realise that I have lot of luggage and need to go to a platform. Train is arriving in 2 minutes and there is no way, I can make it. Other dreams are also similar themes, with location and charater change, base story same.

Every single time, when I wake up from this dream, I feel scared and dont know what to do. I heave a sigh of relief thinking that it was just a dream.

Now when I am writing this, I realise that none of these dreams, I miss the train or incur any loss. Its the thought of loss/failure. This is a classic case of fear of failure before the actual failure. It is known that our dreams reflect our lives. If the same situation happened in real life, I could have handled it differently. May be cancel the ticket and get a new one. or buy a new ticket, call someone from the local phone and ask for help. There could be a lot of solutions that can be worked on, but in my dreams none comes to my mind.

Yoga

I have been a Yoga and fitness enthusiast from the time I was in school. Been practicing its various forms on and off from that time. Sometime the gap in practice is as long as 10 years but I have always come back and started again.

When I was in school in Pune, this is 1988 to 1991, I remember we had Yoga teachers (was it Iyengar teachers) come to our school to teach us Yoga twice a week. We had to bring proper clothing on those two days. I have vague memories of stretches that we did, pranayam and the chantings. It was one hell of a cool feeling post the session. I also remember those early morning TV chat shows where once a week, Yoga practitioner would come, teach Yoga and answer the questions sent by viewers. Those were the days of sending letters to the TV station address. The teachers stressed on the fact the Yoga practice is about focus and peace of mind, flexibility. Its about making a connection with self, rythmic breathing practices, holding the poses and feeling the pleasure. Of course the Yoga practice also stopped as we got transfer to other state. Second wave of Yoga practice came when I was in college and placed my hand upon Iyengar's books on Yoga. All nostalgic of those memories, I practiced again for a few years on my own, attended a few meditation classes as well ( while in college in 1999  at the age of 20 something). Loved the experience but due to lack of company and guru, the practice stopped after a few years.

That was then.

I am in Pune again (the land of BKS Iyengar) the city of health conscious people and I am again introduced to all kinds of Yoga. This is 2012 now, lot of water has flown over the bridge. We have all kind of Yoga derivations now like Hot Yoga, Cold Yoga, Rain Yoga, Power Yoga and may be a dance form of Yoga and what not. All focused on fat reduction, calorie burning for the modern well to do pot bellied instant gratification generation. These are all aerobics where no attention is given to breathing and flexibility.

Yoga when done with the mindset of quick weight loss and aerobics instead like a meditation, it does not help in the long run and people quickly loose interest.

I remember that BKS and yoga gained wide spread acknowledgement due to its famous pupil Yehudi Menuhin who while on his tour in India got acquainted with BKS and the rest as they say is history. BKS travelled the world with Yehudi, giving demonstrations and lectures and gaining followers. Stories are replete of his success with various country heads. This is my holy grail.

Since I am no Yehudi, I had to hunt for my guru who could teach me those principals and practices. I tried various trainers and classes only to reject them after a few class.We see these muscular weight trainers with crash course on yoga teaching in glamorous gyms. They seem to be more worried about how much you sweat rather than how much you pay attention to your posture and breathing. That is the problem with crash courses. In three months practice of theory and practicals, one can not aspire to become a trainer and that is why the fickle followers who jump from trainers to trainers and gyms to gyms looking for a quick solution.

Yoga is like meditation, it increases your focus, gives you peace and happiness. This can not happen in a matter of few months, it takes a lifetime of commitment to the form.

wow my blog is still on...the right time for me to just start.

wow  my blog is still on. I like it. So many people writing so many posts and most of them not making too much sense except for the fact that they look more like curated stuff to attract visits. Am I the only one who feels that the emotions are missing, Those simple things that strikes a chord is missing in the writings. 

Karma

I am always amused when I hear "Karma is Bitch" I wonder at the origin of this expression. May be it means to say that however good work you do, you are screwed and no matter how much nice you are to people, your one stupid things ruins it all. I guess its fair for all us to just dont care and keep doing what we think is right. Too much thinking or getting scared will not lead to us any path. For a genius work, we all need to just focus on important things and probably take life a little easy, they say no one gets alive any way so why fuss.

When I see myself in the mirror, I hardly smile. If at all I do, its comes out as a forced one. There is something wrong somewhere and it needs correction. I must look into it before its late. I need to slow down and do things which are really important and leave all that is unimportant. 

Delhi and Mumbai

I am a true Delhi fan and Pune is tough for me ...the first example is Food. Since I work in office and I will use this instance. In Delhi, we come to office and start talking about food or what will we have for Lunch. If I open my dabba say at around 12pm as I am hungry and can not wait for lunch break, I will have 10 people around me to see what I am eating and share. Here in Pune, when I open my dabba at 12pm, I ask 10 people if they are hungry and care for a bite? I see none of them even looking at me to answer, they will keep looking at their computers and say no, they will eat at lunch break...I finish my tiffin all by myself...

Star and beyond

I have been thinking of writing about this for a long time. In most of our movies, serials and now even in the kids cartoon character, the protagonist is a lazy careless guy. He is not interested in working hard, studying or focussing in anything in life. He sings, dreams and does mischief of all kinds and still is a winner. Since my daughter watches a lot of these animation and my younger cousins also watch a lot of ShinChan and Doraemon and are influenced, I will stick to these. In Shinchan, the kid is 5 year old, never listens to mother, is full of mischief, is a source of trouble to everyone in school as well. When it comes to tricks or anything heroic, this guy suddenly becomes a champ, fights and defeats the villian, can do all the impossible tasks. All the other kids want to become like him. Similarly in Doraemon, the protagonist is Nobita who is yet again a lazy guy, never studies, likes to sleep etc etc. Again in a case of war/misery or any problem, this guy comes out as a winner, his mind is suddenly sharp and he is able to save the world.

So when kids watch these serials, they are hugely influenced by them. Their logic is if you are genius, u dont need to study and you can just do magic when the time comes. But hell no, this is life..here hardwork is equally important. Unless you struggle, work with focus and contstantly be at it, you will never be able to succeed. Why can we not have stories that teaches right moral values, teach importance of hard work, respecting elders, working with family.

I have always said that there is no substitute for hard work..

restarting

Thinking if I can restart the blog by blogging atleast two times a week..I get up fairly early in the morning...should get that kind of time..getting frustrated with life ..nothing that I can say am proud of..may be its the phase that will pass on...